Friday, June 17, 2005

Pistons-Tigers Update

Tonights Pistons game was amazing. Thirty one point victory, I would have never believed that any game in this series would have been decided by a margin as large as thirty points. I'm not sure what a lot of peoples opinions of Hubie Brown are as an announcer, but I think hes great to listen to. I also wonder if hes actually alive. I think hes probably been dead for about twenty plus years. Here is what I assume his daily routine is. Emerge from vault around five-ish in the evening. Re-apply any clumps of decomposing flesh which may have fallen off during sleep, before arriving to the arena in a hearse. Call the game. Leave arena and start to harvest bodies/souls. Take bath/soak in young mens blood to sustain himself for another day. I bet in whatever cities that Hubies calling games in the missing person total goes up by about 10 or 12. Another thing I hate to read about, and that the national media seems to focus a lot of attention on is the low rating for the Finals games. I never understood why this is newsworthy. 1) I am watching the game, thats for sure, as are 99% of my friends, (wait im not friends with a hundred people so how could I get 99%, im not even friends with 4 people). So then 100% of my friends are going to watch the game. 2) The NBA Finals, no matter how low the ratings may be, will never NOT be broadcast on TV, the networks pay and make too much money for them not to be televised, and even if they dont come on a network channel, Im sure one of the 2,983 other cable channels will carry the games. 3) Why would I care if some fruit picker in Southern California decides to go siesta instead of appreciating Lindsey Hunters tenacious defense or if some housewife in suburban Atlanta decides to watch "Hit Me Baby One More Time" on another network instead of the Finals. Its not like Im going to randomly call up someone and say "Did you watch the game?" have her say no and then become so flustered that i wont have any idea what to talk about. Not going to happen, so please stop informing me of ratings and percentages. Please.

Meanwhile the Tigers just completed an impressive sweep over the Padres, meaning that the Pads have never won a game in Detroit, which is kind of a cool stat. I like that Detroit had to beat San Diegos two best starters to get the sweep. Bonderman pitched great again today, and now has 8 victories with about 40% of the season completed, which actually puts him on pace for my one friends drug induced prediction of 20 wins this season. This is a quality of marijuana that the government never tells you about. They always harp on memory loss, and impaired motor skills, but never inform you of the seer-like abilities that happen as a result of the drug. You need burnout friends to find this stuff out for you. The Padres were getting desperate to beat Detroit, I even read that if they were to play a fourth game in this series they were going to drag Tim Lollar out of retirement to make an emergency start. Another great sign from this series, well from this week in general has been the outstanding play of Placido Polanco. I watched him yesterday go opposite field against Eaton three times, all of them were impressive at bats too. The only unnerving thing about Polanco so far, other than his name, which Ive already touched on, is the shape of his head. Right now Im at a complete loss for words on how to describe the shape or why it irritates me so much, However I am going to tomorrows Tigers game against the Giants, so maybe if I see it in person, Ill be better able to describe the effect it has on me, if one even exists. Oh well, Im excited about the Tigers game tomorrow night, and will post about it in the near future.

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